For those of you who did not attend the IDAHO event you actually missed a good evening of speakers and learning about what it happening within the County to combat Homophobia and Transphobia., so you now have almost  a whole year to remember the next one which is on 17th May 2011, so mark it in your diaries now.

There are several articles in this month’s edition that show how things have changed for the LGBT population and part of that is really how people have started to accept the diversity of the UK, but some things are lost which evolved out of necessity at the time, like the art of the language Polari, which I remember still being in use when I was a young gay man (yes I know it was a long time ago) but now this language has almost gone, it is a shame but shows that it is not now needed. But in another way a report published this May shows what appears to be institutional homophobia taking place within the Government Borders Agency affecting LGBT asylum seekers this surely is wrong. Enjoy the summer folks (while it lasts).

The team at Gay Surrey would like to thank everyone for supporting IDAHO on 17th May  2010

Gino says I am sure you would agree it was a very informative evening; the exhibitors were amazing, speakers inspirational and radical. It has been hailed as one of the most controversial events we have held since Gay Surrey was formed and we have only just begun.  These events cannot continue without the ongoing support from the police, public authorities, companies, charities and the community and your kind donations

On the 17th May Gay Surrey launched the GScoalition and Manifesto, setting the next year into play for “action” before the 5th year IDAHO event on the 17th May 2011
Gay Surrey have called for all authorities to supply within 7 days, 3 tangible goals for the manifesto and will have one year to fulfil them, the announcements and manifesto will be revealed on the 17th May 2011 at Surrey County Council – Kingston. Over the coming weeks we will keep you all posted on what will happen and how we and our partners plan to make change in surrey in less than one year
Heart of Equality Awards went to

• Di Stiff - Surrey History centre (Surrey Heritage)
• TEASE nightclub Guildford
• BBC Surrey – Media
• Terry Reed– Founder GIRES
• Elmbridge Guardian Newspaper
• Pam Frost – Interim Director of Learning and Development
• Keir Schiltz – service manager - surrey youth development service
• Outline – Charity – The Helpline  
• Mike Patey – LAGLO
• Gino's personal choice award went to - Chris Ward

Polari, a vibrant language born out of prejudice

British gay men developed the eclectic, secretive slang at a time when society stigmatised them. Luckily it is no longer needed

Polari (also spelt Palarie, Parlary, Palare and various other ways) is a form of language that is most commonly associated with gay men (and to a lesser extent lesbians), used in the first two-thirds of the 20th century in British cities that had large and mainly underground gay subcultures.

The language was particularly well known in London and was associated with chorus boys who danced and sang in West End productions, and male prostitutes who drank endless cups of tea in seedy cafes hanging out around Piccadilly ("the dilly") looking for "steamers" (clients).

Chaps who joined the merchant navy after the second world war looking for a glamorous life of travel to exotic lands while working as dining staff or stewards also used Polari, adopting new words from languages encountered around the globe. These were not the butch sailors of Jean Genet – instead they were the outrageous precursors to today's camp flight attendants. The most elegant of these sea-queens would host fabulous soirees in their cabins, complete with printed invitations, vodka martinis, Alma Cogan records and costumes that would have made Shirley Bassey weep with jealousy.

Polari is something of a mongrel language – if it can even be called a language at all. It arose from a number of overlapping "low" forms of slang that were associated with travelling or stigmatised groups, stretching way back to the Thieves Cant of Elizabethan England.

The 18th century added words from the molly house culture – mollies being men who had sex with other men, sometimes while dressed as women. Their subculture involved using female names and parodies of birth-giving and heterosexual marriage. A great deal of what we know about them comes from court records, "sodomy" being a capital offence at the time.

The 19th century also saw the incorporation of some Parlyaree, the Italian-derived language used by travelling entertainers, fairground people, costermongers and beggars. Later influences on Polari included Cockney rhyming slang, backslang (pronouncing a word as if it is spelt backwards), Yiddish, Lingua Franca (words from sailors slang), American air force slang and the vernacular of drug users. Polari speakers developed their language as a result of mingling with these transient communities.

Polari was a secret language never committed to print or tape recordings. Instead, it was passed on via word of mouth and, as a result, many versions were created at the same time. Most speakers would have known a small core vocabulary of words for clothes, types of people, adjectives to show approval (or not), sexual acts and everyday objects – but there was also a "fringe" vocabulary containing many words known only to a few. Standards of spelling, pronunciation or even meaning were not always adhered to.

Polari was much more than a camp fad, however. It was a necessity. In a world where homosexuality was stigmatised through the institutions of law, medicine and religion, these men needed a way to express themselves without getting caught. Dropping the odd Polari word into a conversation with a new, handsome acquaintance was one way of working out if they might be interested.

Other, more adept speakers would conduct entire conversations on public transport in Polari, dishing the dirt on last night's trick or giving detailed deconstructions of the hair and fashion choices of the hapless lady sitting across the aisle.

Polari also acted as a form of initiation into the gay subculture, with the older gay men teaching the newbies all of the words and "christening" them with their own camp name – Nathan becomes Nanette.

Some Polari words labelled the technicalities of cruising, gay sex and various sexual identities – words mainstream society had not bothered to provide words for (or if they had, they were nasty ones); others gave new words for existing concepts.

In this way, Polari could be seen as a form of anti-language, a term created by Michael Halliday in 1978 to describe how stigmatised subcultures develop languages that help them to reconstruct reality according to their own values. Halliday used "anti-language" to describe the language use of Polish prisoners, but the concept applies equally well to Polari. A Polari word like "bona" meant good. However, it wasn't a straightforward translation of the English word "good" – it meant good according to the values of a Polari speaker. As such, anti-languages demonstrate opposition to mainstream society. Polari was often used in a rather sardonic, cutting way, to demean or objectify, and this was never more so than the range of feminising words that were used to refer to the police – the natural enemies of the Polari speaker. "Betty bracelets", "lily law", "hilda handcuffs", "orderly daughters" – these terms all mocked and questioned the gender identity of this particularly persecuting organisation.

It was this rather snarky aspect of Polari that contributed to its decline. By the 1970s, gay liberation politics had become impatient with camp stereotypes and the casual sexism of some older gay men. Overexposure due to the popular 1960s radio series Round the Horne, which featured two camp Polari-speaking characters, had also spoilt the secret, and the decriminalisation of homosexuality meant that there was less of a need for an anti-language.

Since then, gay men and lesbians in the UK have gradually stopped being part of an anti-society, and have moved towards the mainstream.

I love Polari, but hopefully, the narrow-minded social conditions that led to its creation will never require anything like it to happen in this country again.

Paul Baker
guardian.co.uk, Monday 24 May 2010

Gay asylum-seekers face 'institutional homophobia' from UK Border Agency

Groundbreaking new research suggests that asylum-seekers who have been raped, tortured and threatened with death because of their sexual orientation in their home country are being routinely deported due to systemic discrimination in the UK's asylum system.

No Going Back, published on 23rd  May, features for the first time detailed evidence not just from lesbian and gay asylum-seekers but from staff at the UK Border Agency (UKBA). The evidence has been gathered by the charity Stonewall, which campaigns for the rights of gay, lesbian and bisexual people.

The report quotes UKBA staff acknowledging that they receive no guidance on interviewing gay applicants from countries such as Uganda, Jamaica and Malawi and that determinations are often made on the basis of out-of-date or inadequate information about an asylum-seeker’s country of origin.

It suggests that UKBA staff often assume that applicants are either lying or will be able to avoid detection if they are returned to their home country. But the report quotes Indira, a member of UKBA staff, who admits that “Someone from Jamaica claiming they’re gay will just automatically be disbelieved”.

Between 2005 and 2009, the UK rejected 98 per cent of asylum applicants who cited sexual orientation as their reason for being persecuted. This compares to the rejection of 77 per cent of asylum applications as a whole between 2005 and 2008.

Stonewall are encouraging the UK authorities to remember that sexual relations between consenting adults of the same sex are criminalised in eighty member states of the United Nations. The report highlights the suffering inflicted in a number of these countries on gay, lesbian and bisexual people.

Stonewall's Chief Executive Ben Summerskill said, “This report provides both shocking and clear evidence of institutional homophobia in Britain’s asylum system. Legitimate asylum-seekers are frequently being deported”.

The coalition government which took office in the UK earlier this month has promised to ensure that asylum is granted to gay, lesbian and bisexual people fleeing homophobic persecution.

Summerskill said, “We’ll now be pressing the UK Border Agency and the Home Office urgently to implement the manifesto promises made by both partners in the new government to end this profound injustice”.

Stonewall has developed a series of recommendations to ensure that fundamental errors of judgement made by UKBA staff are urgently rectified.

These include robust policy, guidance and training for all UKBA decision-makers to ensure that legitimate lesbian, gay and bisexual asylum-seekers are questioned effectively and given fairer case hearings. The charity also insists that Home Office Country of Origin services should be improved to reflect up-to-date, accurate information on the scale and nature of homophobic persecution.
http://www.ekklesia.co.uk/node/12219

Pink pound loses its glow as more gay couples become parents, the way gay people spend their money is changing as they become parents and enter civil partnerships

Could the pink pound be destined to go out of circulation? Although research suggests gay people, particularly men, still have plenty of disposable income, the introduction of civil partnerships and the increasing number of gay couples becoming parents seem to be changing the way many think about money.

According to research by gay market research company Out Now Consulting, gay men and women earned upwards of £81bn in 2007, while a separate survey by OMD Insight found that monthly spending by gay men on cosmetics was almost double that of straight men. It also found that 40% of gay people surveyed invested heavily in new technology, compared with 25% of heterosexuals and that gay consumers took an average of four flights a year compared to the straight person's three.

But society is changing, and assumptions about dependent-free gays are being challenged. In the three years to December 2008, nearly 34,000 same-sex unions were registered in the UK, while according to the Office for National Statistics, 170 children were adopted by same-sex couples in 2007 and 2008. In that same period 560 children were adopted by single people and, although the statistics don't reflect the sexuality of these adoptive parents, it is likely that at least some were gay or lesbian.

Out Now Consulting is about undertake the largest ever gay market research study across 14 countries, but it has already found signs that becoming a parent has a big impact on gay men's attitudes to spending. "The introduction of children into gay men's lives does impact on their lifestyle and expenditure habits," says the company's founder and CEO, Ian Johnson. "This is likely to become part of the lifestyle impacts affecting gay men." Of those surveyed by Out Now for a 2008 study, those with children were less likely to splash out than their childless peers on international holidays and more than £100-worth of cosmetics a month.

But do gay people prepare sufficiently for children? Francis and Rob (who prefer to remain anonymous) found the expense of family life came as a shock. The civil partners last year adopted two children, a boy aged six and a girl aged five. Their lives have changed remarkably, not least financially. "Before, we were not careful with our money," says Rob. "We avoided being in debt, but in general spent a lot and saved little. We did a lot of travelling – our last holiday was in Bora Bora. Our biggest splurge was designer furniture by Ligne Roset and Hulsta." It didn't stop there, says Francis: "All my wardrobe was designer: McQueen, Dior, D&G …"
And now? "Raising children is more expensive than we expected," says Rob. "We need to economise a lot. Gay couples probably have higher standards on the items they buy for their children in terms of quality and design. Our savings are gone and we have no investments left. We have a reasonable pension, but it looks like we will have to work until we are old."

Even so, the couple were reluctant to let their financial situation affect their desire for a family, having always felt they could afford children if they changed their spending habits. "We shop at Zara now, instead of Selfridges."

Harry Housen, 34 and gay, has also learned the meaning of compromise when it comes to finances. He has agreed to father a child for a female friend, and the pair are ready to make their first insemination attempt. Previously, Housen used credit cards to support his expensive tastes.

Last year, however, when he considered buying a two-seater sports car, he realised that it wouldn't work with a young child. Harry has no choice but to save, and with a mortgage on a new three-bedroom house to pay, on top of a potential new arrival, his financial priorities have been reassessed.

"I will set up a fund for the child that he or she can get when they're 18 or 21 and that will hopefully pay for their studies, or a wedding. I've become really good at budgeting."

Nick Baron
The Observer, Sunday 25 April 2010

Gay Surrey

As always Gay Surrey has all the latest updates on their website, so why not take a visit www.gaysurrey.org

IDAHO 2011 just a heads up for next years day:

17th May 2011

Articles needed urgently

A lot of articles this month have come courtesy of www.pinknews.co.uk although some of the articles have a local reflection a lot do not. Please contact me with local news and information that the LGBT population of Surrey would be interested to know. You may run a business that you wish to advertise (free of charge) please send me a copy electronically.

Surrey Domestic Abuse Helpline
Are you being frightened, hurt or
abused by a partner or family member
24 hour confidential service
01483 776822

East Surrey Domestic Abuse Outreach Service
01737 771350
(Serving Reigate and Banstead, Mole Valley and Tandridge)

North West Surrey Domestic
Abuse Outreach Service
01483 776822
(serving Woking, Runnymede and Surrey Heath)

North Surrey Domestic
Abuse Outreach Service
01932 260690
(serving Epsom, Ewell, Elmbridge and Spelthorne)

South West Surrey Domestic
Abuse Outreach Service
01483 577392 or 01932 260690
(Serving the Waverley area)

Relate, West Surrey
Provincial House
26 Commercial Way
Woking, Surrey GU21 6EN
01483  715285   www.relatewestsurrey.org.uk

TWISTER Youth Club!
LGBTQ Young People, Surrey Ages 13-19
Various Nights 7.30pm - 9.30pm
www.surreycc.gov.uk/twister

Naz Project
HIV and sexual health support service for
South Asian, Middle Eastern, North African, Latin American and other excluded communities
e-mail naz@naz.org.uk
Website: naz.org.uk
0208 7411879  9.30-5.30 Mon-Fri.

Guildford Area Gay Society (GAGS)
Meets every Wednesday, phone Simon on 01252 370809
www.gags.org.uk

The Cellar
Disco runs last Saturday of
each month 9.00 pm - 2.00 am and social meeting Friday evenings 8.30 pm midnight
Farnham, Surrey (phone for details)
01252 715844

Homophobic Incidents
Call Surrey Police on:
0845 1252222 or www.stophatecrime.co.uk
WSLAGLO@surrey.pnn.police.uk or 01483 630474

GUM Clinics
Genito-Urinary Medicine

Farnham Road Hospital, Guildford
01483 537007

Blanche Heriot Unit, St Peter’s Hospital, Chertsey
01932 722669

Frimley Park Hospital, Frimley
01276 604105

K2 Clinic, Wolverton Centre, Kingston Hospital
For Gay and Bisexual Men
Wednesday 6.00 - 8.00 pm - walk in only
0208 934 2843

Local Voluntary Organisations

Outline
Lesbian and Gay Helpline
open Sunday and Tuesday between 7.30 and 10.00 pm
01483 727667

www.gaysurrey.org
offering help, support and advice locally
to those who need it
Tel : 0700 5982 429 anytime
Young Gay Surrey
Website dedicated to 13 to 19 year olds for help and support www.ygsspeakout.org

The following Charities offer advice, support and
information to people infected and affected by
HIV/AIDS

Positive Action
0800 9801990 (freephone)
01252 345019
THT Surrey Region
01483 263160
St Peters House Project
01737 763000

Married Men’s Group
A group for men who are married or in
relationships with women and are attracted to
or having sex with other men.
07801 629972

RASASC
Rape and sexual abuse support centre
01483 546400 female staffed (7.30-9.30) closed Saturdays and Bank Holidays